Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
