I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
In other news, I just burned my penis
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
