we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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