we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize