Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Randomize
