Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize