I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
So much rum. So many feels.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Randomize
