I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Never joke about your clitoris.
try to milk me bitch
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