You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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