I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
sex in a hospital.. check
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize