And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
