I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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