I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize