break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
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