Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize