I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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