i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
