You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
