this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Randomize
