haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
