dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize