i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Just pee around me
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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