Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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