HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
