Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
