the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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