When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
