I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
