I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
is that a dick in a sweater?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
