Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
