Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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