I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Do you remember whose house we're in?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize