Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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