I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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