i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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