I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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