erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
