This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
