Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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