didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
