I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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