fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
