farters have to be the big spoon...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
