Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
