exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
