that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
only if we run a train.
done.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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