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I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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