ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
