Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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