Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
