Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize