I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I have feelings that need drinking.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
